The photo for my instagram post was almost a plant. I literally went to hit post and I was like, I’m doing it again. I’m hiding. This time it’s behind a plant. Stop that nonsense. And then I thought, what would scare me? Oh yes, posting a picture of me wearing the Britney Spears microphone I wear when coaching. Yes, that would do it. You'll have to go check out my instagram post for that one! Ok, let’s continue:
You know what scares the absolute crap out of me? Showing up on instagram and on my website and putting myself out there into the world.
In my life, I’ve most frequently taken the supporting role route. I don’t often share what I’m working on with much of anyone, least of which on a public forum. Heck, I just recently started sharing my food photos to Facebook almost two full years after starting food photography! I kept them in a safe little bubble on Instagram and would freak out when anyone I knew in real life started following me. The same thing started happening here and LET ME TELL YOU THAT FREAK OUT WAS x1000. But I digress.
In 8 years of doing portrait photography I think I shared the fact that I was a photographer maybe 3 times publicly. Side note: If you only know me as a life coach, I also do photography, both food and portrait. And I’m a pediatric occupational therapist, hi, hello. This is me. Vulnerability and sharing myself fully feels wildly uncomfortable. I’ve never, ever wanted the spotlight. Not in class, not in my friend groups, not at work.
One of the very best examples of this is when I was In 3rd grade, I landed the lead role in our school play. I freaked out, turned it down and asked for the part with the least amount of lines. In many ways, that’s how I’ve lived my life. I have things to offer and help and contribute to other humans, only to hide those gifts away.
Showing up here feels like I’m walking into the lead role, into the spotlight with nowhere to hide. Here’s to me showing up fully in my life and letting you know it’s safe for you to do the same so we can both live out our biggest, wildest dreams. No matter what they might be. Here goes nothin! 💗 P.S. And hello to my real life friends and family. I see you and I love and miss you.